so many things

What enlightens my mind?
Kind words and simple smiles
beautiful faces and sweet melodies.
Never becoming too content with life as it is
rushing into good things, and loving every moment.
Moving forward, but always looking back.
Embracing every second of life
and taking in the natural vibes of the earth.

Yes, my writing has become sparse
The flow of writing has left my finger tips.
How am I supposed to gain it back?

By just as I described,
embracing the day and enjoying life.
It's time I do what I want to do,
it is time to be selfish,
but selfless and compassionate at the same time.
It is time to love myself, but love everyone else a little more.
I am in the midst of change, ad I absolutely love it.
Never knowing what a free spirit was like,
has been implanted in my mind forever.

Life can take me in any direction I please
and I absolutely love life!
Although the solid road looks beautiful and easy.
I choose the path less taken, the path I will build for myself.
And I am ready, I am here!

New

Everything is going so amazing!
I guess the grass is always greener on the other side.

But I guess you can't forget the land you came from.
Never ever ever will I forget.

Yet I am having too much fun!!

I think I found closure

For so long I sought to find the source.
The source of broken friendships
the source of change
the source of my unhappiness.

The source is myself.
I have dwelled too long on the past
too long have I tried to apologize and receive no forgiveness
too long have I waited for change
too long have I punished myself


I have forgiven myself, and I forgive you.

"Forgiveness does not always lead to a healed relationship. Some people are not capable of love, and it might be wise to let them go along with your anger. Wish them well, and let them go their way." -author unknown


I have found peace

love Kesha!

Life amazes me!

If I had learned anything in the last 20 years of existence,

it would be that we learn to loose to prepare to gain.

We loose friends, we loose family, we loose nautical nonsense

that we think is oh so important.

The times we are down and depressed,

are the times that build us up stronger to take on a new day

so that we may gain new friends, new family, and a new chapter in life.

Of course not everyone knows, but I have made a really big decision.

A decision where I am choosing to leave what I have,

what I am so content with. And starting a new chapter,

a new beginning far far from this little rock.

Yes, I am terrified, worried, anxious, excited, and extremely depressed.

But with one end comes a new beginning, right?

I also have been taking on a new dietary lifestyle, no meat!!

Also, trying not to consume so much GMOs,

which is in pretty much every man made product out there.

And I feel fabulous! I have a much clearer mind, and I feel very balanced.

I have noticed the decisions that I have made that I blamed other people for.

I've noticed the great friendships that I let slip away.

But I can't only blame myself, there are always two sides of the story.

And of course each side is right.

But when I try, when I put myself out there I get ignored,

shut down. Well I guess that means that chapter has closed.

It's time for a new beginning.

oh the drama

I should just die because I am the lowest of the lowest of the lowest scum in the universe.

And would you care absolutely not.

(by the way to anyone who reads my blogs. When I say "you" "he" "she" if it's not a direct name or relation, it is a completely indirect term. Meaning I am directing it to the world, no specific person.)

why

does depression have to kick in on good days.

i really should talk to someone..

relief!

School is done!!!! (for now)

And I will embrace every opportunity I get, appreciate the people I am with,

and remain worry freeee!

Yes, I am really going to love this break.

To Do list:

•BEACH

•SURF

•FIESTA

• Be with happy people

•Stay away from immature overly dramatic people

•BEACH

•eat LOTS!

•FIESTA!

•Be with friends

•SURF

•Love

•Laugh

•FIESTA!!